Time

Hey there!

How are things? Hope your are well!

It's soon "Valentine's day" in Brazil. It's celebrated on 12th June. I know it has nothing to do with St. Valentine but I couldn't find another name to what this date represents in my country.

Althoug this text is not about this date, I found this a way to start writing about time and to mention the song Time after Time by Cindy Lauper.

I guess this text is more about this song than anything. And I have a question for you.

Is there a song that makes you feel a strong connection with you and your life even if you have no idea why it happens?

So... this is how I feel when I listen to this song.

I feel so emotional when I listen to it and as much I try to understand the reason, crazier I get lol.

I go crazy because it has no conclusion. And if I keep thinking about it, I feel a little bit frustrated because there's no "solution".

Perhaps it's time to realize that there are some things that has no need to have a conclusion and just accept the feeling and the emotion that what is felt is just felt and there's no need to understand it "scientifically" or mentally.

Feelings have to felt.

Math has to be solved.

When and if they are "face to face", the fight happens because they both are strong their ways.

"Time after time" brings me a sense of feeling something that I've never felt in this life (yet) and it also gives me hope to go after what is still unkown.

It's a little bit scary but not anything that will paralyze me and led me into a terrible traffic jam of feelings.

As a curious person I have become, I feel the urge to look for what it is hidden in my soul. I hid it myself and I am the only on in the possession of the key to open my trunk.

If at least it was a small box, it could be easier to open it and make new discoveries about what is still a mystery inside of me.

But I had the immense "capacity" to put everything inside a trunk ahahahahahah and when I open it, I'm sure it'll be a huge mess and it'll take me some time to find things out.

Have you ever had the feeling that you locked all the most pure emotions you have inside of you? And you know that it's time to re-open it but you are afraid of being hurt again?

Have you ever thought about your past actions about any stage of your life and felt like you had done anything good for yourself?

If yes, why didn't you think about yourself first? About what could bring you joy and make you grow as a person? Fear? Insecurity? Embarrassment? A thought of "what others will think about me"?

I've realized some of those thing above some weeks ago and I felt angry with me. And extremely disappointed at my lack of actions against me.

Regrets? Well... yes and no. It's more like frustration!

Do you think "time after time" may mean that we keep making the same mistake over and over again?

It's nos just about love but about the path we've been following?

Have you ever thought of the path of your life and the stones you may have found along the way? What did you do with them?

I know everyone has their own pace but when it looks so slow... Is it because we don't have the courage to surpass the obstacles that cross our way or because we have this kind f personality/behaviour?

Oh my... so many questions...

I've learned that if something won't be harmful to anyone and especially for me, I can go forward and have a good life. It may not be perfect but we can make the best we can and reach live the life we have dreamed of.

And only time will tell if that was the best choice for ourselves.

It doesn't mean that it's gonna be the last thing we will do in our lives and that will be the end of ths story but it means that we can dream and make each and one of the come true.

'Cause everything that is from the bottom of our hearts brings its best to our lives.

We just need to believe in it time after time.

"If you're lost you can look and you will find me... Time after time" (Cindy Lauper)

Cheers

xoxo